Morning of Your Very First Day- Back to School

As summer fades and back to school season starts, many kids feel a mix of emotions. This can include excitement, anticipation, and anxiety. Starting a new school year is stepping into the unknown, full of new teachers, peers, and expectations. This can be especially true when starting middle school, high school, or college. These big transitions can bring about big feelings. For some, these changes can be swamped by anxiety and uncertainty. While gathering the back to school supplies on the supply lists, we can also prepare our mental health toolkits and use our tools to manage those big feelings.

Recognize What You're Feeling

Many times the first step in dealing with back-to-school anxiety can be simply acknowledging the emotion. Anxiety often shows up as that tight feeling in your chest, racing thoughts, or even physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches. Instead of trying to push those feelings away or stuff them down, recognize and acknowledge that they exist. It is okay to be anxious. Anxiety is often a natural, normal, and healthy response to change and uncertainty. Sometimes acknowledging "I’m feeling anxious about going back to school” can help reduce the anxiety itself. Labeling your emotions can help with beginning to understand and manage them.

Safety Nets in Routines

Anxiety thrives on the unknown.
What will my new teacher be like?
Will I make friends?
What if I can't handle the workload?
Where do I eat lunch?
The uncertainty of all these questions can lead to racing thoughts and overwhelming nervousness. One way to calm these thoughts is by creating routines that can build and reinforce a sense of safety. Start practicing the school routine about a week before the first day. Wake up at the same time, have breakfast, and do a mini version of the school day. This way your body and brain may not be as overwhelmed by the change when school starts.

Sharpen Your Toolkit of Coping Strategies

Every kid has their unique way of handling stress. It can be helpful to think of coping skills as a personal toolkit filled with things that make you feel better when anxiety strikes.

• Grounding
  These are simple exercises to help you stay present.
  Try the 5-4-3-2-1 method: Name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This pulls your attention away from anxious thoughts and back into the moment. If 5 is too many, try to find and name 3 things that are the same color. Click Below to check out more grounding tools.

• Breathing Exercises
  Slow, deep breaths can calm your nervous system when anxiety flares. Practice by inhaling for four counts, holding for four counts, and exhaling for four counts. You can also add to this by drawing a side of a square while breathing, another side for holding, another side for exhaling, and the last side for taking another breath. Try doing this a few times when feeling overwhelmed—it signals to your brain that you are safe and helps reduce those anxious feelings.

• Create a Comfort Object
  Some kids find it helpful to have a small, familiar object in their backpack or pocket—like a smooth stone, a keychain, or a piece of fabric that reminds them of home. This is a tangible reminder that they're not alone and can offer comfort during tough moments.

Talk It Out

Sometimes, the best way to ease anxiety is to talk about it. Share your feelings with a trusted adult, a friend, a coach, or the school counselor. You might be surprised to find that others are feeling the same way. When you talk about your worries, they often feel less overwhelming.

Parents can be very helpful with these conversations. Parents can create an open space for kids to express their anxieties without judgment. Ask open-ended questions like, "What part of going back to school makes you the most nervous?" This invites kids to explore their feelings more deeply.

Stay Connected to the Bright Moments

Anxiety often makes us focus on worst-case scenarios. While it is important to prepare for the challenges, try to keep sight of the happy and exciting things too. It can be a favorite subject, a beloved teacher, connecting with friends who have been away for the summer, or getting back into a sport. Remind yourself of the fun aspects of school to help balance out the worries.

One creative way to do this is by keeping a "bright moments" journal. It could be as simple as "I smiled at someone new today" or "Lunch was fun." Over time, you can start to notice the wins more easily and look back to all the progress that has been made.

Practice Kindness to Yourself

Be gentle with yourself. Anxiety can be touch, but it does not have to define who you are. Many people feel anxious and overwhelmed, even if they don’t always show it. It is ok to have hard days. It is ok to not have everything figured out. It is ok to not know everything on the first day. Give yourself permission to feel whatever you’re feeling, and remember that every day is a new chance to start fresh.

You Got This

Back-to-school anxiety is normal, but it doesn’t have to take over. By preparing your mental health toolkit, you can make the transition smoother. Transitions and changes can be scary, but they also help us grow and discover how strong and powerful we can be.

Click Below to learn more about therapy with tweens and teens.